31 Jul 01

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Good Lovin'™

I'm getting a lot of Good Lovin'™. But I am not getting very much done. I'm almost completely out of casholies now, but I've never been happier. For the last two weeks I have been telling myself and everyone else that this dream must necessarily end. I must get gainful employment and stop vacationing.

I used to poke fun at my friend Marcus because he gets sex every day. Every single day. Doesn't it get mechanical and tired for him? Oh no, he reassured me.

I guess I can vouch for that now.

I told The Cherub the other night that what he gives me, that particular mix of humor and warmth, energy and romanticisim, and everything else - that's a complex molecule. He's the only source on the planet for that particular molecule, and just like the US RDA of vitamins and minerals, I need it every day. Just because I have plenty of Vitamin C and D, that doesn't mean I don't need any B1. That principle is true across the board.

Sometimes I have the most trouble making even the people closest to me understand that. You are the only source of what you give me. I need that. So even for purely selfish reasons, I can't cut you off. You didn't think I entered this commitment lightly, did you?

It's a cyclic event for Wlofie and me to get into a row about whether I express fully enough my desire for him, and whether he's convinced that I want him. I can only hope that the proof of time, love, and faithfulness, in its original meaning, will be sufficient.

I am a very, very faithful lover. It means that I am committed, deeply and thoroughly to your welfare, to your happiness. It means that we are bound up together, not only in the present but also through the future. It's faithfulness of the oldest and deepest sort, not to be profaned by inanities about exclusivity.

~

I began the above several days ago, but didn't get to finish it before the weekend. And oh what a wonderful weekend.  

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