I am very depressed. A meeting with Rebar didn't work out, and chances to meet get slimmer all the time. He has a lot of work these days, and for the most part this is a good thing. The tax man cometh, you know. But the work has been in New York, when I am mostly closer to Philadelphia nowadays. My own ridiculousness did it, looking at a clock wrong and figuring much more time than there was. He came all the way into the City to see me, and I was not in the agreed place at the appointed hour. I feel like an idiot. He didn't have the time to wait for me to get there. Fuck.

     The Wall police stopped me on my way home. Remrkably, I was driving in a completely legal fashion, and had not forgotten to return my registration and insurance cards to the glovebox, so they were there when I needed them. I had opened it up but thought better of it, the officer might get the heebies seeing me rummage around, so I was field stripping my cigarette as the officer stepped up.
     "Sorry to make you put out your cigarette, ma'am."
    "That's ok, it was over anyway."
    "I just stopped you because your headlight is out. Can I see your license and registration?"
    I already had them out, so I handed them over.
    "Did you know your headlight was out?"
    "Yeah, I noticed it this morning when I left, about six - no it was earlier."
    "Have you had anything alcoholic to drink today?"
    "No."
    "Where are you coming from?"
    "Oh god, I was in New York today. Took the train from Long Branch."
    "What's your license look like?"
    "What's it look like?" I was looking at my license in his hand. Looked ok to me.
    "Yeah what's it look like. Got any points?"
    "Oh. I dunno, I was in an accident a couple months ago, but I have a court date. Inclement weather, went into a skid."
    "Hang on a minute, I'm gonna take your license to the car, enter it into the computer."
    "K." I leaned back in the seat while he did this, wishing I could go to sleep.
    "Ok," he was back already, "You can go. You did have your seat belt on didn't you?"
    "Yeah," forgetting just when I unbuckled it, then remembering it was to reach the glovebox to get the registration.
    "Ok, don't forget. Have a good night." I was pretty obvious about checking for traffic on the road before pulling out, and otherwise looking like the careful driver that I am.

     Now that damned headlight has to be fixed. I'll have to go buy the bulb myself and figure out its installation, as there just aren't any funds to have it done at a shop.