FAQ stands for Frequently Asked Questions.
Why do you expose your life online?
Because my life is an open book, online and off. There are very few questions I will not give a direct and honest answer to. I've discovered that it's the simplest way to be, and suits me wonderfully. Since I am the same person online as I am offline, that honesty is the same.
You have two husbands?
Depends on whom you ask and how you define the word. If you ask any governmental agency, I have only one husband, Wlofie, whom I married in a municipal building in Åstorp, Sweden on 5 August 2002. To me, that's paperwork. I loved Wlofie and bound up my life with his long before that.
I've loved and been committed to Captain Napalm for nearly as long. I relocated to live with him, and Wlofie relocated to live with us. Finally all our immediate family is in one place. I'm terribly, terribly happy.
How do they get along?
They approve of and accept each other, and are becoming very good friends. Each knew that I was polyamorous before they chose to be involved with me - it's part and parcel of the whole relationship gig. And I consult existing lovers before forging relationships with new ones - that continues even more firmly of course now that we are entrenched in spousehood.
And you have two playmates?
Or friends with benefits, yes, though we're at an odd place now, as we don't get to see each other much anymore due to scheduling and geographic issues. That's a terrible shame, and I miss both friends an awful lot, not just for the physical stuff but for the friend stuff. These are my closest friends.
Do your guys know?
I made sure, and continue to make sure, that I have spousal support before, during, and after being involved with anyone else. Deception is cheating, and that stuff don't fly.
Doesn't sex ruin a friendship?
Not for me it hasn't. Falling in love has done very strange things to friendships for me before, but not sex.
What is polyamory?
Polyamory means loving more than one person at the same time. There are countless sites on the net that can give you more information. Enter the word into any search engine and you'll find tons.
Doesn't that mean swinging? Or group sex?
Some swingers are polyamorous, and some polyamorous people swing, but they are not the same thing. Being polyamorous does not necessarily mean having sex with all your partners at the same time, or even having sex with all the people you love. These are all matters of personal preference. But it is not at all unusual to meet poly people who do not have casual sex and who make love with only one partner at a time.
Doesn't this make you a Mormon?
No. Being a follower of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints would make me a Mormon, if I were one. I used to be one when I was a teenager, but have long since renounced my belief in it, to my mother's great distress. Mormonism has nothing to do with the structure of my relationships.
So, what religion are you?
Roll Your Own. Seriously, I identify as Unitarian Universalist, which pretty much means the same thing. It's not a creedal religion, but rather a covenental one, meaning that there aren't any specific beliefs you are supposed to have, but you make a commitment to yourself, your co-congregants, and your fellow beings to be as true as possible to your own beliefs and to support others in theirs. More about UU is available at the Unitarian Universalist Association website, and more about my congregation is at the UU Fellowship of Boca Raton website.
I find it very interesting that nearly all my friends believe and/or practice Roll Your Own religion, whether they identify as or know anything about UU or not.
What do your childen know of your love life, your religion, or anything else?
My children are precocious. Plus they are Army brats, and they've wound up with a mother who gives it to them straight. So, they know everything they want and need to know, but nothing they don't want and need to know. They know about love and sex, but they don't know about my own personal activities. They understand having two stepfathers and are benefitting immensely. They know about important social and historical issues. They know what Holocaust means, and what gay bashing is, and what the Karen guerillas in Burma are about. I encourage them to think for themselves and to ask questions.
What school do they go to?
We homeschool here. My children have special needs and abilities that the local school system cannot satisfy.
So, like Cartman, they sit around and do nothing all day?
Hardly! Although we use an unschooling model, we do deeply enriching activities, something that is commonly known as "guerilla education". We immerse ourselves in materials of many kinds, from films to books to music to the Internet. We participate in artistic, recreational, and social events in the community. The children own a fledgeling yet already mildly successful potted plant business. We nearly live on Wikipedia and spend a lot of time at the library. I make sure that the activities we do involve developing the same basic skills and knowledge that they'd be bored to death trying to learn by rote in a classroom. It sticks with you better when it's relevant to your life.
Which guy is their father?
None of the above. Their father is a soldier across the county whom I divorced several years ago. We are inherently incompatible and should have realized it sooner.
Is he cool with everything?
So far he seems to be. I'm a pessimist by nature, however, so I wait for the other shoe to drop. We'll have to see.
If you have a question, please send it to 
