Journals and Pain  I am not supposed to be writing in here, I am supposed to be cleaning house.  Tomorrow, my husband will come home, and tomorrow is the Gus' Aquarius party.  I do not wanna leave this house a nightmare.  BUT...      I just read in Jane's journal that she is closing it, it's over.  It makes me sad, but I understand, and if it helps, then I am all for it.  That now makes two closed journals on my front page.  Bobek's "from the makers of Journal" is halted, too.  I don't know if Jane will leave her journal online or remove it completely; bobek assured me he will leave the existing parts there, just not add to them.      I understand this medium brings quite a lot of pain, somehow, when you let the details of your life out over the net day after day.  At least it does for others; I get my pain elsewhere.  It never hurts me to reveal myself here, because I reveal myself everywhere, it's natural to me.  In fact, it's therapeutic for me.  I get hurt when I am receptive.  It's when I let people into my heart where it feels good to have them, where their well-being matters to me, where their actions strongly affect me.  That is where my pain comes from, so this journal doesn't cause me pain, but it can definitely reflect it.  Like when I handed the reins to mourningdove.      Feels good to have them back.  -- Spring